When the New year rolls around one question that I often get asked is “What are your New Year’s resolutions?”. My response used to be something like “this year I want to lose 10 lbs, or this year I want to meditate, or be more positive.” I started off enthusiastically, really believing that this would be the year that my resolutions came true, the fact is that they usually didn’t.
So why don’t resolutions work for most people? They don’t work because they are usually really big goals with no real action steps. They may also fit with something you think you want or you think will make you happier. Another reason they don’t work is that they usually involve changing a habit and that means changing your behavior, which takes a lot of motivation and dedication. I am not saying that you shouldn’t have goals, what I am going to explain below is a more effective strategy to come up with goals that you really want and can achieve.
1. Connect with yourself. Before you set goals, or make any resolutions, I am going to ask that you spend some time with yourself visualizing what you really want your life to be and how you want to feel. By doing this visualization you are separating the voices that tell you what you “should” want and what you truly want. You are a unique, beautiful human being and your goals should match you. When you focus on goals that you think you should want, or that others want for you, it is very hard to stay motivated and succeed.
2. Now that you have connected with your vision and how you want to feel. Take a moment to write down three main areas of your life you want to work on. Some areas may be: Physical, Mental, Spiritual, Social, Emotional, Relationships… Pick three areas that feel like they need the most attention. Don’t worry you can focus on the other areas too, but trying to do everything at once can lead to failure and disappointment.
3. For each area you choose to focus on, write down where you are currently and then write where you want to be. For instance if you want to focus in spirituality your statements may be: “I feel disconnected from my Spiritual life” and “I want to feel a connection to Spirit daily.”
4. Now the key part. In order to reach your goals you must make the commitment to take daily action to reach your goals. Real success is achieved by taking steps everyday. Gauge your commitment level to reach your goals on a scale of 1 to 10. If it isn’t a 9 or 10, what reasons can you connect with to increase your commitment level? Do what you need to, in order to raise your commitment level.
5. Write down one small action step you will take every day for each of your three areas. For example, if you are going with the spiritual goal, ” I am going to meditate for 5 minutes before bedtime”
6. Put reminders on your calendar or in your planner so that you actually take these steps. This may mean putting post it notes. Do whatever it takes to start taking action today.
I promise you that if you take these steps you are going to much more successful at reaching your goals.
If you want support reaching your goals, email me at kavitalifecoach@gmail.com to set up a complimentary consultation.
